Andrew and Lucy off to France for their snowboarding holiday tomorrow, both on a high as good things happened for both of them at work,I am so pleased for them they really deserve this time ,they have been so supportive to us, and just last weekend to Johnny and Ellie too. I am very proud of them both.
Philip is feeling happy too, good things happening for him too at work, king of fun things.
John and I went to the Anglican Cathedral yesterday morning and lit a candle for Maureen and the family, I said the lords prayer for her as she would have liked that. I don't know if anyone listens to our prayers but sometimes the ritual is helpful to the person performing it.
Churches can be useful spaces for times like this.
We got the bus and John walked to the Cathedral from The Philharmonic Hall. The he walked to The Everyman where we had a nice lunch.
It is wonderful to see how well John is doing now, no morning carers thank God. He sleeps less now and can stay up later and longer.He travel to London and Cambridge under his own steam with a little help at each end.
Next weekend, he is going to spend two nights here on his own while I am at The Mill Hotel and Spa with Philip. I will let some people know that he is on his own, but he does not want carers in, he seems happy to try this out and although I am a bit nervous, I respect his wishes to do this.
I think now that if John has a relapse I will find it very difficult to cope with. last year I was preparing for his departure, and I may well have been ready to let go. Now though, I am not,I can't face going through all this again. Of course some day I will have to.
I am especially glad for Penny, Johnny and David that he is doing well, as they have had quite enough to deal with this last year.
Lets hope for the very best and prepare for the worst, somehow we need to do this.John says he has not lost sight of the seriousness of his illness and the fact that he will die. I guess that comes with age, I admire his ability to do this. Well done John.
I am taking an interest in gardening , in pots, I think watching things grow is very grounding and slows me down a bit too.My aim is to have lots of colour by Andrew's birthday.
I am grateful for my family close and extended.
I am grateful for my friends.
I am grateful for nature
I am grateful for good food and wine
I am grateful my work
